Kids look for guidance every day. Occasionally, they even ask for it. Kids have questions that beg answers and fears that hover over them. Not always will they admit their insecurities and if they work them out on their own, that’s great! Most of the time, they will need an assist. An observant parent will notice when their child is struggling emotionally. Prompting a troubled child may get them to speak if they are ready, and most of the time things can be worked out.
A proactive maneuver to consider is to put positive ideas in your kids' heads in advance. If successful, these ideas will provide helpful ways to look at everyday issues giving them the patience and/or confidence to move forward until a problem is resolved. These ideas can be stated, preached, taught, practiced and/or written down. They can be borrowed from quotes or books, preachers or mentors, friends, or invented on your own. For instance, one of the 'wisdoms' that helped me tremendously as a young boy was when I was told by my mom, "Don't worry, this will go away in time and you will feel much better." I remembered this advice every time I was upset about something. Granted, sometimes it takes a long time for things to "pass", but knowing a 'future me' will be healed made the 'present me' feel much better.
Posters of encouragement can be made and placed strategically. A list of 'thinking points' can be printed out as reminders to drive these ideas into the sometimes thick skulls of your kids. The list below is an example. It is a photo of a page consisting of little 'wisdoms' given to my kids back in 2001 (excuse the chopped off letters). If I were to write something like this today, it would likely change significantly. But that was what I thought would be of help at the time. I know at least a couple of ideas were absorbed because they were repeated back to me.
As your children's parents, you know them best. Therefore, you can devise the thoughts and sayings that would work best for them. Ignore their seeming disinterest. When the need arises, they will want help and will remember where to look for it. At a minimum, they will know you care, and that alone is a significant act of love towards your children - something they need to know.
Yes, I’m corny and a little Pollyanna, especially considering my macho guy nature. LOL! But if being a little corny and Pollyanna-ish helps my kids or grand-kids, then call me ‘Polly’ for short.
Michael Byron Smith, father of three, grandfather of four.
A proactive maneuver to consider is to put positive ideas in your kids' heads in advance. If successful, these ideas will provide helpful ways to look at everyday issues giving them the patience and/or confidence to move forward until a problem is resolved. These ideas can be stated, preached, taught, practiced and/or written down. They can be borrowed from quotes or books, preachers or mentors, friends, or invented on your own. For instance, one of the 'wisdoms' that helped me tremendously as a young boy was when I was told by my mom, "Don't worry, this will go away in time and you will feel much better." I remembered this advice every time I was upset about something. Granted, sometimes it takes a long time for things to "pass", but knowing a 'future me' will be healed made the 'present me' feel much better.
Posters of encouragement can be made and placed strategically. A list of 'thinking points' can be printed out as reminders to drive these ideas into the sometimes thick skulls of your kids. The list below is an example. It is a photo of a page consisting of little 'wisdoms' given to my kids back in 2001 (excuse the chopped off letters). If I were to write something like this today, it would likely change significantly. But that was what I thought would be of help at the time. I know at least a couple of ideas were absorbed because they were repeated back to me.
As your children's parents, you know them best. Therefore, you can devise the thoughts and sayings that would work best for them. Ignore their seeming disinterest. When the need arises, they will want help and will remember where to look for it. At a minimum, they will know you care, and that alone is a significant act of love towards your children - something they need to know.
Yes, I’m corny and a little Pollyanna, especially considering my macho guy nature. LOL! But if being a little corny and Pollyanna-ish helps my kids or grand-kids, then call me ‘Polly’ for short.
Michael Byron Smith, father of three, grandfather of four.
