Category: Holidays

36 Quick Suggestions for Your 2024 Attitude

12/27/2023

My granddaughter, Malia, reading when she was 11

For the New Year 2024, I hope the best for everyone. Most of it is up to you! This includes doing your best to be better no matter if it’s saving money, being a parent, or exercising. Of course, you can’t be the best at everything but you can have an great attitude! Here are some suggestions for your 2024 attitude. You don’t actually have to do these things (we can’t), but you can feel this way inside. Just think of John Travolta in the opening scene of “Staying Alive”. If that doesn’t put a bounce in your step, nothing will.

If you don’t like any of these suggestions, use your own. If you have your own thoughts on 'being like', let me know them in the comments section and I may publish them.

So......

Sing like Whitney Houston
Dance like Fred Astaire
Laugh like Eddie Murphy
Walk like John Travolta
Play like a child
Love like Mother Theresa
Pray like Billy Graham
Give like Bill Gates
Cook like Julia Childs
Inspire like Dale Carnegie
Share like Winnie the Pooh
Rock like The Rolling Stones
Swim like Michael Phelps
Run like Carl Lewis
Teach like Jesus
Be happy like Happy (one of the Seven Dwarfs)
Travel like Rick Steves
Read like my 15-year-old granddaughter
Climb Mountains like Sir Edmond Hillary
Write like Ernest Hemmingway
Build like the Egyptians
Play tennis like Serena Williams
Fly like Chuck Yeager
Exercise like Richard Simmons
Paint like Rembrandt
Design like Da Vinci
Invent like Edison
Lead like Churchill
Sleep like Rip Van Winkle
Be calm like Buddha
Study like a monk
Take photos like Ansel Adams
Ride like the Pony Express
Act like your know what you’re doing
Imagine like Elon Musk

36. But still be your best self!

#Powerofdadhood

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Naughty or Nice? Parent Edition

12/14/2023

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My grandchildren Dec 2016

With Christmas nearing, parents’ attention turns to thoughts of ‘what do we get the kids?’ If we’re honest, it rarely has anything to do with whether they were naughty or nice. More likely, it has to do with ‘competition’! Competing for their favor or trying to keep up with what their friends have or will be getting. Or, maybe your gifts are based on guilt. Guilt for not spending enough time with them or for being too self-obsessed.

Yes, what your kids get for Christmas can be based on how naughty or nice you have been, not your children!

We have seen good parents and bad parents. Where do you stand on this scale of effective parenting? Whatever the answer, how you perform as a parent is not likely to change much unless you are truly interested in changing and are persistent in your efforts. So let us take a look at some naughty or nice parental criteria and think about how we raise our children.

A Parental ‘Naughty or Nice’ List

You show your love for your children - nice!
You’re over committed outside the family – naughty!
You give one-on-one attention to your children – nice!
You don’t really always listen when your kids talk to you – naughty!
You comfort your kids when appropriate – nice!
You and your spouse don’t agree on how to raise your kids – very naughty!
You’re tough on your kids when you need to be – nice!
You praise your children’s efforts and rejoice when they are persistent – nice!
You forget your children are watching you – naughty!
You say what you will do and do what you say – very nice!
You think you know it all when it comes to parenting – naughty!
You teach your children know how to set and meet goals – nice!
You teach your children to be self-reliant and responsible for their actions – nice!
You remember to have time to yourself, to reenergize - nice!
You have an open mind toward things you don’t understand – nice!
You love being a parent – nice!

Check this list twice, and find out if you're naughty or nice!

These are just a few of the things that most of us would consider naughty or nice as we raise our children. But all of us are naughty and nice to some degree. What we hope for is to be working towards being nicer and away from naughty. What is important to remember is to not buy your children’s love or make up for your shortcomings through expensive gifts. This and every Christmas, if you indeed celebrate Christmas, be sure to remind your family of its deeper meaning. And the wrapped gifts you give should pale in comparison to the love you have shared with every child.

#powerofdadhood

Original version published Dec 2016

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A New Year's Gift to Your Children (no matter their age)

1/1/2022

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Kids go through stages. Stages of growing, learning, maturity, understanding, etc. There is a great lesson to be taught in every stage, whether it be how to share, how to be responsible, how to be kind, and so on. All parents know it takes a lot of patience and perseverance to teach these important characteristics. Some of us are better at it than others. There is, however, one lesson every kid should learn before they are tossed out into the cold, cruel world. It's a two-part lesson. From that time forward, it may be the last greatest lesson you can give them.

What is the first part of the lesson? It is one that will free them from many ills such as, dependence, regret, self-pity, misunderstanding, anger, and resentment. It is something kids are taught to be when they are young because it is an admirable trait. But, unfortunately, the lesson doesn’t always hold true in the real world. It’s not that it doesn’t happen frequently, but it can never be assumed or to be counted on. So what is the lesson?

I. Life is not fair and one should accept that reality.

It is true. Life is not fair as we all have experienced. There are many examples of it. Some people have fancy homes and cars while others live on the edge of hunger. That doesn’t seem fair at all. Some people are born into money, some are born with lots of intelligence, and others just seem to have more energy and better instincts. None of those things are fair, but you know what? That’s just too bad and we must get over it!

II. The second part the lesson: "Success is about leverage”!

Kids need to know that in the adult world, decisions are not always made according to fairness. They are more frequently made based on leverage. For instance, educated or skilled people have the leverage of better performance than those who don’t. They are the ones who are awarded scholarships, better jobs, and more money if they use that leverage!

Yes, you say, but there are some not-so-educated and not-so-hard working people that have more money. True, and that may not be fair. But surely they have leverage in some way that allows them to have more money. Any person born into a western culture like the United States has much more leverage than a very hard-working person born in the slums of Calcutta. The leverage in this example is birthplace. Again we see that it isn’t fair that some people are born less fortunate or in the wrong location. But life is not fair and likely never will be.

Note: Be as fair and ethical as possible, but don’t depend on it coming back to you!

Anyone can come up with examples they think are unfair. But in every one of those examples, there will be a situation where leverage has come into play. I thought that it was unfair when I went to college, that I was a commuter student without dorm friends who, I discovered later, helped each other study and had access to all kinds of old tests, etc. They had the leverage of instant help from smarter people who lived across the hall. It wasn’t fair to me, who studied alone. But I didn’t have the leverage of living in the dorms or knowing how things really worked in college. Yes, being naive is on me!

Note: There is NO leverage in being naive!

Here is another example. Should there be a minimum wage and is it fair to have one? Most people who have minimum wage jobs do not have the leverage of an education or special skills. People who hire them have the leverage of a large pool of non-skilled workers from which to choose so they can pay as little as it takes to get the employees they need. You can say it is unfair to these workers who may work very hard for their wages, but the employer has the leverage.

The only leverage unskilled workers may have is when the public, via their government representatives, has sympathy towards them. If deemed by law, these unskilled workers must be paid more than the market alone allows. This becomes fairer for the workers but unfair to the employers who now have to pay an artificially higher amount than the market. It may also be unfair for those that will not be hired because of the higher cost of labor. A majority in a democracy will almost always have leverage.

My wife was a teacher, my son is a soldier, one of my daughters is a college counselor and my other daughter is an occupational therapist. None of them make even one percent of the salary of an average major league baseball player. I think we now know that this is about the leverage of their talent, not the fairness of what occupations are most important in society. We accept that. And I do enjoy baseball even though they are overpaid in the minds of many. It’s not fair that some people have unique leverage that you could never attain, but you can’t wallow in that.

Note: There is no leverage in wallowing!

If your children can understand leverage and the ethical use of leverage, they have a tremendous head start over their peers! Being young, in itself, is a great leverage tool! Young people have time to earn, learn, and implement the things that will become leverage for them later in life, without ever depending on fairness or luck! Those people with this attitude are the ones who seem to succeed and be the most “lucky”.

Note: Understanding leverage IS leverage!

Leverage that doesn’t exist by chance can be built. Working hard in school to have good grades creates leverage over others to get into college or even a scholarship. The education attained via scholarship provides leverage over those without an education to get the best jobs. The money you earn is generally higher because fewer people have your education or skill. We all know that having money is classic leverage.

Note: There is tremendous leverage in a good attitude, a good education, a good work ethic, and a good understanding of how the world operates.

Like intelligence, a special talent, or being born into a well-to-do family, sometimes leverage is given to you. That is a gift. But leverage can be wasted if not valued. Also, leverage given to you can be taken away. It is the worst kind of leverage because you are counting on others and not yourself.

If your older children can grasp the notion that building leverage is to their advantage, that complaining about life not being fair is a waste of time, then you have given them a tremendous advantage in life. The leverage of understanding life, of having a work ethic, and knowing their success is basically up to them, could be the greatest lesson of their life!

Note: Having leverage is not always fair, and being fair does not always create leverage. But try to be fair anyway. It's best for you!

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Top Tips for Keeping Your Kids Safer in the Pool

6/30/2020

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Beyond love and nurturing, the main duty of a parent is to keep their children safe! Due to COVID-19 stay-at-home orders and warmer temperatures, families are starting to get out and enjoy their outdoor spaces. This includes opening up pools for swimming. That’s why now is the perfect time to reiterate the rules of pool safety, especially for parents.

Thanks to safetytoday.org for this life saving information!

As a parent, you know that swimming pools are equal parts fun and dangerous. While your kids are focused on the fun part, you’re usually left worrying about safety. And rightfully so. Pools can be a dangerous place, even for experienced swimmers. However, there are lots of ways that you can make the backyard swimming pool a much safer place for your family.

Teaching Your Kids the Basics

No matter how safe the pool itself is, you have to make sure your kids know how to be safe in the water. These are a few things to teach your kids.

Slowly introduce your kids to different techniques so they can learn at their own pace.
Cover basics like getting in the pool safely, treading water, and floating on your back.
Help your kids get comfortable being underwater so they know what to do.
Facing fear is important for becoming a confident swimmer, but don’t push too hard.
If you’re not comfortable teaching your kids yourself, swim lessons are always an option.

Securing the Pool

Pools pose a variety of dangers, but there are many things you can do to reduce the risk. Consider these precautions when getting your pool ready for the season.

Assess the normal wear and tear of your pool and do repairs or maintenance if needed.
Get a pool safety fence, cover, or net to keep kids from entering the water unattended.
Set up a comfortable spot by the pool where you can supervise your kids as they swim.
Make sure your pool chemicals are stored safely.

Staying Safe in the Water

Securing your pool and teaching your kids the basics is just part of the equation. These tips can make each swimming session safer.

Make sure everyone knows and follows the pool rules.
Check pool toys before each use to make sure they’re clean and in good shape.
Keep in mind that while float toys are fun, they’re not designed to be lifesaving devices.
Review the signs of drowning and make sure you know what to do.

Pools can be a source of stress when you’re a parent, despite the fact that they provide endless fun for kids while also getting them off the couch. Taking precautions such as teaching your kids to swim safely, putting up a fence, and making sure your kids have safe water toys will help minimize the risk.

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A Six-Year-Old Christmas on Steroids!

12/16/2019

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What kid doesn’t like Christmas? My four grandchildren certainly do, but I have a 6-year-old grandson, Ryan, who is crazy for the Christmas SEASON! Yes, I said season! He started his celebration on or before November 14th when he serenaded me on his toy guitar, singing Christmas tunes (see video below). The Thanksgiving turkey was still warm when his excitement accelerated faster than my Tesla. He was ready for the decorations, Christmas Specials, snow, music, and especially the spirit of it all. His grandmother, charged up with his enthusiasm, decided to invite Ryan and his 4-year-old sister Juliette to help us put up our tree – way too soon for my liking. They came over, dressed in Christmas jammies with Ryan donning a Santa hat.

As Christmas music played in the background, Ryan and Juliette decorated the bottom third of the tree. Then, Ryan noticed the imbalance and brought a stepladder over, whistling and swinging his head back and forth, shoulder to shoulder to “One Horse Open Sleigh.” Kathy (grandma) laid a Christmas cover at the bottom of the tree, and Ryan exclaimed, “That’s a new one, Yady! (Kathy’s grandma name – long story). I remember last year it was a green one with gold trim.” Indeed, he was correct. I would never have noticed. They slept over and spent the night watching Christmas shows on Netflix and slept with red and green lights on dim.

Of course, their Christmas tree had not yet been decorated, so Ryan and Juliette begged their parents to put it up. The next time we went to his house Ryan, with a big reveal, showing it all with pride, bouncing up and down on his toes as he gave us the grand tour, grinning from ear to ear. It was beautiful, decked out with their favorite ornaments hung with care with only one or two ornaments having fallen. Their tree even rotates, and below is a train that circles with smoke and a whistle, operated by – guess who? One day after school, Ryan wrote a six page book entitled, “How to Decorate a Christmas Tree” – self illustrated!

On our annual Cookie Day, their cousins, Malia and Rosemary, joined Ryan and Juliette - all wearing holiday pajamas. More Christmas music, Ryan dancing to “Jingle Bell Rock,” and all decorating cookies. My two daughters and their husbands had holiday parties to go to that evening, and all four kids stayed overnight. It was a long day! The kids were all into the Christmas spirit and I wondered, “Do they know there are three more weeks to go?”

That night we watched the movie, “Elf” and the kids laughed with glee at the huge elf trying to take a shower in the elf-size shower. Kathy had gifts for them to open, ornaments from Europe where we had just traveled, slippers and more PJs, holiday-themed, of course. Already, presents! Ryan bragged about how many places there would be for him to open presents. He counted five locations, which included our farmhouse, where the entire family celebrates Christmas Eve. I told him I was lucky if I ever had five presents to open, forget five locations! Every year Ryan makes sure we play Christmas Bingo at the farmhouse (B-elf, G-Christmas Wreath, O-ornament, etc.), and the winner gets a “Dollar Store” present. All the kids love it!

Kathy and I watch Ryan and Juliette before school on Tuesdays and Thursdays. One morning they were so excited to show us what they had in their rooms! Their parents had bought each of them a four-foot Christmas tree. They had decorated them to their particular tastes and couldn’t wait to show them off. Two days later, when we went back, Ryan had set up an Alexa Echo under his tree and would listen to Christmas music each morning as he got dressed – and more Christmas music when he got home. Yady helped the kids to make a Christmas chain out of red and green construction paper, starting with 22 links. I was a bit surprised they had waited this long. Every day Ryan wears a red shirt to school to celebrate the season. Yady spoiled him with two more new red shirts to augment his wardrobe.

Ryan and Juliette couldn’t wait for Cha-Cha to show up. That’s their name for their ‘Elf on a Shelf.’ Now, when we come in the mornings, Ryan and Juliette race to show us where they found him that morning. Ryan pretends he’s an Elf with the name ‘Elmo’ and Juliette’s (4 yrs) is ‘Chuck E. Cheese’. Ryan even has a sign on his bedroom door announcing whether the Elf is ‘in’ or ‘out’.

They got to see Santa a couple of days ago - major highlight! Christmas morning will be ‘Crazyville’! Now mind you; there are nine more days before Christmas Day. Remember how long nine days were when you were a kid? Ryan seems to not care for the wait; after all, the SEASON will be over, and what fun is that?

His birthday is New Years’ Day. His parents are so happy it’s only a week of anticipation!