She Doesn't Need a Dude!
In a recent interview, the singer, Katy Perry, announced that she would like to be a mother someday, but claimed, “I don’t need a dude” to have a child. Outside of the obvious biological necessities, she is right. Ms. Perry is rich and can provide quite nicely for as many children as she wants. But maybe her children could use a dude—a dude her children would call…Daddy!
I understand Ms. Perry’s desire to have a child. It’s natural for a woman to want to be a mother. It’s also natural for a child to have both a mother and a father! Unfortunately, too many children do not have two parents in their lives and they almost always suffer for it--in obvious and not-so-obvious ways! If Perry cannot find a man suitable as a loving mate and responsible father, then she may be too busy making money, or too much into herself. Good men are out here if Katy and other women look in the right places.
Fatherless Homes are a Worldwide Issue
I was disappointed when I heard a panel of three women and two men discussing Katy Perry’s “dude” quote. The three women discussed the financial aspects stating that, unlike most single mothers, she could afford a nanny and all things necessary to raise a child. Maybe it was alright for Perry, but not for most single women. Not until one of the two men spoke was the child’s need of a father mentioned. This points out, to me, the lack of emphasis on the importance of men being necessary in parenting. Unless you are interested in the topic, few people are familiar with the magnitude of issues involved in fatherless homes. A topic I have addressed quite often.
Single parent families exist for many reasons, many of which are preventable. Couples have children before they really know each other, and eventually separate. Irresponsible people can also have children, but can’t commit to them. But to plan, in advance, to have a child without a father’s involvement in its upbringing is never fair to the child. When impressionable young women hear Ms. Perry say that she can have a child without a father (dude) in its life, it’s a dreadful, misleading message! I would ask her to not sacrifice, on purpose, a child’s right to have two parents just to fulfill a personal desire.
As a role model, involuntary or not, Ms. Perry should be aware that there are those that will follow her lead, or feel vindicated by their choice to be a single mother. This creates huge personal challenges for the mother and her child and contributes to many growing social problems. Having been raised by Pentecostal parents in a strict religious atmosphere, Ms. Perry’s comments are more confusing. She had a loving mother and father and was raised with values that one would assume would never tempt her to think this way. Maybe saying she would have a child without a father was a way to get publicity. If so, it certainly worked—but at the expense of possibly causing undue influence on young women and their decision on this topic.
Think for Yourself People!
We have enough problems in this world without having celebrities putting their stamp of approval on questionable behavior. Single motherhood is not cool! We don't stutter just because Porky Pig is cute when he does so. So don't drink beer thinking beautiful girls in bikinis will magically appear. Don't vote for legalizing pot just because Willie Nelson would endorse it. Don't twerk because Mylie Cyrus twerks. You just might look like a jerk when you twerk! They and other celebrities don't live in the real world--especially Mylie, Willie, and Porky! And think very long and hard before purposely bringing a child into this world without all the advantages that are due it. This includes having a father in his or her life!