This article was written nine years ago when my first book, THE POWER OF DADHOOD, was coming out. Since that time our grandchildren have from toddlers and babies to 3rd, 4th, 5th graders and a high school freshman, my son has retired from 20 years in the Army, and I lost my beloved wife, Kathy, 20 months ago. She absolutely LOVED Thanksgiving. My children, grandchildren, and I miss her so, but we are still thankful for all the love she gave us for so many years!
I loved this photo of Kathy, so I am republishing this Thanksgiving article, which still holds up, in her honor!
I loved this photo of Kathy, so I am republishing this Thanksgiving article, which still holds up, in her honor!
My wife Kathy with the main course! 11/27/2014
To all those who read my blog, I want to say HAPPY THANKSGIVING! And thank you for taking time to read my thoughts on family and fatherhood. What a great time of year it is to rediscover your family and reevaluate how you treat and communicate with each other.
It’s difficult sometimes to be with loved ones, even during the holidays. Many live out of town, some are serving in the military. There are also in-laws to consider for married couples, multiple grandparents, and unfortunately for children, divorced parents and often two homes for them to celebrate. We are stretched to see all, or too far away to see anyone. But reach out however you can to show your love and concern.
I know of some sons and daughters who call their mother every day, and some mothers who expect and need it. I think that is great that they do this! However, I don’t call my mom every day--not even close, but we have a relationship that does not require that kind communication. My mom has no doubt of my love for her and knows I would be there for her at the drop of a hat. I know she is safe because my brother lives with her and my sister lives within two miles.
To all those who read my blog, I want to say HAPPY THANKSGIVING! And thank you for taking time to read my thoughts on family and fatherhood. What a great time of year it is to rediscover your family and reevaluate how you treat and communicate with each other.
It’s difficult sometimes to be with loved ones, even during the holidays. Many live out of town, some are serving in the military. There are also in-laws to consider for married couples, multiple grandparents, and unfortunately for children, divorced parents and often two homes for them to celebrate. We are stretched to see all, or too far away to see anyone. But reach out however you can to show your love and concern.
I know of some sons and daughters who call their mother every day, and some mothers who expect and need it. I think that is great that they do this! However, I don’t call my mom every day--not even close, but we have a relationship that does not require that kind communication. My mom has no doubt of my love for her and knows I would be there for her at the drop of a hat. I know she is safe because my brother lives with her and my sister lives within two miles.
Usually, extra tables are required for large gatherings I bring this up because you must treat each loved one differently. Some need attention, some are uncomfortable with attention. Some are easy to be with and others can be difficult to be around. There are also perceived jealousies to deal with and sibling rivalries that come and go while others last forever.
In light of all these factors, I suggest, that at special times and during certain events, you go one step further than you normally do with relatives and loved ones.
In light of all these factors, I suggest, that at special times and during certain events, you go one step further than you normally do with relatives and loved ones.
A little touch football before enjoying our dinner. - Say “I love you” if you rarely do.
- If you never hug, do so. If you do hug, hold it just a little longer.
- Don’t carry any grudges. Forget any current issues while you are together.
- Recall and discuss good times of the past. Don’t bring up old wounds.
- Be sincerely interested in everyone and their families.
These are not revolutionary thoughts, just reminders. And while you may say we should be this way at all times, you are right. Realistically, however, we will not. Just go that one step further than you normally do and be thankful for all you have.
Again, I appreciate any and all of the support you have given me. Please recommend my blog and/or upcoming book to any father who is young, new to fatherhood, or seems lost as a dad. Healthy parental-child relationships go a very long way towards happy and successful lives and make events like we have seen this past week, less likely.
PS. Play touch football before eating or you'll NEVER get to it! Enjoy your turkey!
